What is Self Love?
The dictionary translation - a regard for one's own well-being and happiness.
But what does this actually look and feel like in the reality of day to day life in the modern masculine world?
I read and talk a lot with the sisters in my life about Self Love - and like most women I am exploring what it means to genuinely love myself on a moment to moment basis - but how does a woman truly embody this kind of love when the masculine paradigm she lives within consistently tells her that she isn't enough?
Not enough until she loses weight, enhances her breasts and arse in some way, has a baby, a pumping career and successfully juggles both at the same time with ease and perfection? (and this, ladies, is just the tip of the iceberg!)
With the continued growth and addiction to social media, and the collective consciousness spurring us on to always achieve more, it comes as no surprise that deep and meaningful Self Love still appears as something empty and external - something that we need to do - yep, Self Love, done!
It becomes a beautifully idealistic, yet possibly unattainable glossy and shiny approach where we spend very little time really connecting in and being with all of ourselves, and the majority of time looking somewhere outside of our own depths for this all elusive love.
If I were to believe all that I read and absorb online, then all it would take to love myself authentically is a few long luxurious hours in the bath!
Self love is so much more than a few token affirmations or acts of Self Care.
Nurturing self is important, and for many it is a beautiful way to begin to explore that tentative new relationship of loving oneself from a deeper place after years of abandonment.
My concern is that a deeper disconnect may arise when it only seeks to love and approve of aspects of the feminine self that society deem acceptable, good, worthy, valuable - remaining shallow and superficial if only the light is embraced and the healing potency of embodying the dark is ignored.
For what of the shadow, the anger, the dark feminine, the fierce warrioress?
What of the pain, the depression, the anxiety, the exhaustion?
What of those times in our cycle when we feel lost, overwhelmed, miserable or are channelling Kali?
Are these fragments of our Self not also worthy of our attention and love?
When will you stop turning away from the whole truth of who you are - a divine and beautiful being of many shades - and instead learn to love, embrace and turn to look yourself with adoration squarely in the face?
Authentic and lasting self love begins with deep self compassion and forgiveness, an unwavering trust in and willingness to listen to your own sacred inner voice, and an acceptance of and reconnection with your beautiful divine feminine form. You are so much more than your physical body, but after years of body bashing, self hate and shame this is where the journey needs to begin.
As a culture, women have become increasingly disconnected with their bodies - this seed stemming all the way back to biblical times when Eve and her flesh were the embodiment of evil and sin.
This conditioning and disassociation has carried through the ages until this point in herstory where women are slowly awakening to truth.
And what is the truth?
The truth is - we are L O V E.
Until we feel totally and wholeheartedly comfortable in our skin, until we shed the masks that hide the parts we don't like, until we allow all parts of ourselves to be seen and heard, until we let the layers of story (lies) drop away, until we embrace our shadow side and until we can look at our naked body in the mirror and feel nothing but undeniable and heart expanding LOVE, then something will always be missing.
So I ask you sister - are you ready to get radical and bare all?
Are you willing to do what it takes to fall blissfully in love with yourself?
What is it going to take for you to finally reveal all of YOU?
I am here standing for you and with you as we navigate this path together.
I'd really love to hear from you, for sharing our stories vulnerably gives another permission to open up to -
so let's start a conversation in the comments - what is it that needs to happen for you to finally crack open in love?
Slowly behind the scenes things are brewing, and some beautiful new offerings to help empower you to begin to reclaim your power and love yourself wholeheartedly are marinating away.
A little teaser: think individual intimate workshops - one revolving around reclaiming your menstrual wisdom and the other where you safely and sacredly bare all (literally) - two ways I have personally explored in depth which have offered profound healing of my own personal sacred wounds and a deeper connection with myself.
If you want to stay in touch and be the first to know when I birth these new babes - or any of my other offerings for women - then be sure to sign up to my Sister Circle below