When was the last time you stopped?
I don't mean when you dropped from sheer exhaustion, or when you were bedridden due to illness.
When was the last time you consciously pressed the pause button and devoted time solely to N O N - D O I N G?
Can you even imagine what the delicate art of doing no-thing might look and feel like in your life?
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So much of our precious time (and our time IS precious) is spent DOing.
From our waking hour to when we finally curl up into bed at night we are actively seeking stimuli to quench our unwavering thirst to DO.
Chores, work, parenting - the list of tasks is endless in our ever-increasingly busy world, and our to-do lists are never really done.
Our mentality is achievement focused, our conditioning is to push (hard), and so we strive to fit more and more into our day, often forgoing the healing sanctuary of sleep to feel what is usually only a fleeting moment of accomplishment joy at having scratched yet another thing from our list (I say fleeting because our attention then immediately turns to the next thing to complete - and we are also too bloody tired to appreciate it anyway!)
Even our meditation practise can be goal orientated if we try desperately to quieten the mind - rather than just BE with what is arising!
As daughters of the patriarchy (thanks for this awesome articulation Angela Fitzgerald) we are born into a society that is dominated by the masculine.
So many of our early experiences (the imprints that come from our family of origin, the culture we grew up in, the collective consciousness and the current paradigm) indicate that our needs don't matter, we are here to serve others first and to survive (let alone thrive), we may need to grow some balls, toughen up, deny out intrinsic + cyclic feminine nature and push our way to the top ( and a hefty dose of burnout along the way)
And so life becomes a race as you rush from one thing to the next in a perpetual state of urgency trying to get more done.
WHY?
Where are you trying to get to anyway?
The next moment that feels 'good' and brings pleasure?
What about this moment right now? Can you embrace it and all it brings?
What are you trying to prove - and to whom?
Even if you aren't physically rushing, if that energy is present in your emotional and mental bodies your internal mechanisms will respond accordingly and shift gears into stress response.
This constant and chronic state of existing from the masculine DOING energy is manifesting as BURN OUT for women across the globe.
This is not sustainable - and it's NOT a way to live.
What if you cyclic nature as a woman sees you needing to go in right now rather than be turned on 24/7? What if right now your truth is to switch off and journey to the depths within yourself?
Maybe you resonate?
Maybe this sounds like your life right now?
Rush, race, fast, push, strive, should, must, now, do, achieve
But it doesn't have to be this way sister...
What might it look like to actually S T O P and allow yourself space to simply BE?
No agenda, no phone or computer, no to-do list - just you and whatever the moment brings. Sound challenging?
It can be if you have been doing life on-the-go for a long time.
The benefits for your wellbeing and how you show up in your life can't be underestimated though!
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To help you get started I am sharing 5 of my favourite ways to anchor into simply BEing - I hope they inspire you to make even one small change to your life today.
(NOTE - they aren't revelational or new, but the gift comes from actually prioritising and practising!)
*Take time each day to be still
This can look however you want. It might be a daily meditation practise, some restorative yoga, maybe daydreaming with a cup of your favourite herbal tea - as long as it offers you space to slow down the pace and rest into being. (If you notice old stories about feeling lazy, indulgent (add in your story here) arising see if you can simply observe them, and then let them go.
*SELF-ENQUIRY REFLECTION + JOURNALING
This is a beautiful practise if you are desiring some clarity around a situation, plus it encourages you to S L O W D O W N.
Simply sit quietly and connect deeply with yourself. Then ponder the questions you are seeking insight on and wait for a whispered response from your inner wisdom.
You can choose to just watch all that is arising, or you might write it out in your journal for further reflection.
*TIME IN NATURE
A no-brainer really! Mother Nature runs at a slower pace to us, so by aligning with her energy and groove automatically allows you to reset and recalibrate.
Walk on the earth with your feet naked, swim in the ocean, walk in the forest - the possibilities are entirely up to your imagination and what feels good.
*FEEL YOUR EMOTIONS
Rather than resist what you are feeling (we live in a society that has perfected this art!), what if instead you created space to really feel them.
We truly are experts at running away from our emotions (filling our days up with DOing instead), but these unfelt, denied and unacknowledged feelings stay in your body and over time begin to seep out as manifested illness. Tapping into your vast emotional landscape is not only great for your over all sense of wellness, but gives you a moment to pause and BE.
*BREATHE
Breathe.
Life-giving, soul-nourishing breath....
The breath is your greatest ally and best friend!
She is with you each moment of every day and what an amazing resource she can be, if you let her.
To simply bring attention back to your natural cyclic breath immediately puts the breaks on and lets you slide effortlessly into neutral - even if for a mere moment.
The breath is calming, grounding and forces you (in a gentle way) to become present.
This is by far one of my favourite ways to be with myself.
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Life is not meant to be a race, or done on auto-pilot!
Life is a precious gift to be appreciated and LIVED - but you will miss it if you aren't fully HERE for it, if you're too damn exhausted from your constant doing, or you have you face stuck looking at a list of things waiting to get done!
Look UP sister - what is in front of you right now?
So please sister, pause, Slow Down and let yourself BREATHE and BE - for you not only deserve it, but your whole being is yearning for it!
And please - be gentle woman - this is an art to be cultivated over time, not a few minutes!
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I know I call this The Feminine Art of Simply Being, but maybe your experience feels different? Maybe it is doesn't feel at all simple for you?
Life is full, and with our over-committed schedules I know it can be hard to find the time for doing nothing - but trust me, it is so worth the effort!
My loving invitation for you is can you find even 10 minutes a day to rest into non-doing and see how you feel and what arises for you?
How does the rest of your day unfold when you take even just a small break to BE?
I'd love to hear your insights so please leave a comment below.
With all the love my tender heart has to offer,
Star xxxx
